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Karnes County's community newspaper

(published on March 7, 2007)

The Green Hornet II

(Continued from column published February 21)

Lam finally arrived to pick up Betty and me. We had to leave the Green Hornet set there by the side of the road until we could get a replacement for the flat tire.

Lam suggested that we go Baker’s service station, located just off the college campus, to see if they had a replacement tire or tube. When we arrived and asked Bake, he informed us that he had nothing to fit a 36 Chevy and didn’t know anyone that did. Lam suddenly said, "Big Jim, he has a 36 Chevy and I know he has a spare tire."

We went over to the college to find Big Jim. We saw Dean Stucky and he said that Big Jim was on a Gospel Team trip and would not be back until late that afternoon. Lam and I decided to see if Big Jim had left his car in the Seminary parking lot. We were in luck as it was. We proceeded to get the spare tire and took off to put it on the Green Hornet. We arrived at our destination without incident, put Jim’s spare on and headed back to Ashland and Baker’s garage. It was after lunch when we arrived. I got my flat tire out of the trunk for Bake to repair.

About that time a police car pulled into Baker’s garage. Out stepped a policeman and explained that that they had just received a phone call from Rev. Davis stating that a spare tire had been stolen from his car. "That looks like the one he described, "he said while pointing to the Green Hornet.

"It is," I hurriedly explained. "We just borrowed it from Big Jim to use for awhile."

"Big Jim, Who is Big Jim," the policeman wanted to know?

"Why, that is Jim Davis," I went on. "We play baseball with him on the Ashland College team. We are teammates."

"Maybe, and maybe not, but you guys will have to come with me to police headquarters until we get this straightened out."

"Fine," I said, "Big Jim will vouch for us!"

He put Lam and me in the back of the cruiser and we headed for the police headquarters.

Upon our arrival, the cop marched us right up to the sergeant’s desk. "What are these guys wanted for?" The sergeant wondered.

"I caught these men with the spare tire that Rev. Davis reported stolen," he answered. "They claim they are friends of Rev. Davis and only borrowed it."

"Yeah, yeah," the sergeant grunted.

The policeman took us into a side room, and told us to be seated. He left the room, closing the door behind him. Lam and I looked at each other. We both knew we were in deep trouble. Lam was studying for the ministry and when the dean got wind of this affair Lam might get removed from the Seminary. I would probably get kicked off the basketball team, who knows, maybe out of college.

We were really scared. We knew we had done nothing wrong. We were, however, mentally kicking ourselves for taking that spare out of Big Jim’s car without permission.

After a few minutes the policeman returned and informed us that the sergeant was phoning Rev. Davis to ask him to come down to identify us. For the first time Lam spoke. "That’s a good idea. Big Jim will verify that we are telling the truth about this whole affair!"

"We will see," the policeman stated.

Finally Big Jim arrived and they brought him into the side room. "Rev. Davis, do you know these two suspects, the policeman asked?"

Big Jim took one look at us and stated, "I never saw those two guys in my life!" With that they turned and walked out. We were stunned! What was going on? Why should Big Jim lie? The sergeant would throw the book at us now for sure.

About that time the door opened and there stood and Big Jim and the policeman doubling over with laughter. They really were beside themselves, wiping tears from their eyes as they enjoyed the expressions on Lam’s and my face. Eventually Big Jim spoke, "Fells, Joe, I would like for you to meet my cousin, Harry. He has been a member of the Ashland police force for the past fifteen years."

Then the entire story unfolded. "A couple of guys saw you take the spare tire out of my car," he said. "As soon we returned from the Gospel Team trip, they reported this to me. I decided to have some fun with you guys and also teach you a lesson. I phoned my cousin and he went along with my plan. I just wished you could have seen your faces when I said I had never laid eyes on you before. They turned as white as snow and you looked like you were going to faint," he went on.

"Jim you dirty so and so," we yelled.

This just brought on a new fit of laughter from all the police present.

"Come on you guys. I will take you back up to Bakes and you can get the Green Hornet and we will laugh together."

Well, we took him up on his offer but we didn’t do much laughing. We did realize, however, that Big Jim had pulled one over on us. We would not forget! Fells name may have been Lam but he had a memory like an elephant and old Brubaker wasn’t about to forget this fiasco!

In fact, we remember it so well that Lam and I still talk about Big Jim. In fact I talked with him on the phone as I was writing this column. It is good to remember a friend even if he did make fools of us many years ago.

Besides, Lam and I retaliated, but that is another story.

Joe Brubaker Column Archives    Click here to read previously published columns